Memory and Future
by Orla
Summary: The sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'; Duo receives an invitation.
1. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

* * *

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only   
borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ 

* * *

  
Prologue: 

//Light a candle,   
Lay flowers at the door   
For those who're left behind   
And the ones who've gone before   
Here it comes now,   
Sure as silence follows rain   
The taste of you upon my lips   
The fingers in my brain   
Every gentle, as it kills me   
where I lay.   
Who am I to resist?   
Who are you to fail? 

Got to get you out   
of my mind,   
But I can't escape from the feeling.   
As I try to leave the memory behind   
Without you what's left to   
believe in? 

Could be so sorry,   
for the way it had to go   
But now I feel your presence   
in a way I could not know   
And I wonder,   
do you ever feel the same?   
In whispering darkness,   
do you ever hear my name?//   
(Out of My Mind ~ Duran Duran) 

*** 

The half-empty whiskey bottle wobbled as Duo put it back down on the table. He stared at it for a while... watching it tremble and listening to the music trickle through his half-soaked brain. The bottle lost the war with gravity and toppled over, spilling its liquid contents across the wood surface and onto the floor. 

"Shit." He said quietly, but he made no move to clear it up. As he watched some of the alcohol soaked the edges of the small card that was responsible for the existence of the whiskey. Duo moved slowly forward and, with shaking fingers, he plucked up the card and stared at it. 

The card was small and had scalloped edges. The simple lettering flowed across the surface, and he gently traced the embossed lettering and murmuring the words to himself. 

"You are... cordially invited... to the wedding of Heero Yuy and..." He choked slightly. "Hilde... Schbeiker..." 

But it wasn't really those words that hurt the most. What Duo found painful was Hilde's little message at the bottom, the one that reiterated her words to him of two months ago: *'We've shared to much to sever all ties... I don't want to lose your friendship, Duo.'* 

"You lied to me, Hildey," Duo whispered harshly. "You said my hurt would lessen... you _lied_!" 

The door to Duo's apartment suddenly flew open and slammed against the wall. Startled he. "Oh... hi, Princess..." 

"Where have you BEEN?" Relena Darlian demanded as she walked inside. "The Conference started and you were supposed to be..." her angry words trailed away as she took in Duo's haunted face and the spilled whiskey. Her eyes softened and she bit her lip. "Duo... what happened?" 

Duo held up the soggy invitation. "The mail arrived jus' as I was leavin'." He told her. "There was this lil invitation." 

"I didn't realise that it would get here so soon..." She whispered. 

Duo pushed himself to his feet and regarded her, swaying slightly. "You _knew_ already!" He accused her. 

Relena nodded slowly. "Dorothy called and told me yesterday that they had set a date." 

"Why didn't you tell me?" 

Relena flipped her long pony-tail back and fixed him with a hard look. "Because I knew you'd hit the roof!" She pointed to the whiskey bottle. "Duo... you're drunk! You've been drinking since you opened that invitation haven't you?!" 

Duo glowered at her and turned away. "I'm _not_ drunk." He insisted and promptly walked into the wall instead of through the doorway to his bedroom. 

Relena's lips twitched. "Sure, you're not." 

Duo rolled off the wall and into his bedroom, mumbling expletives as he went. 

Relena sighed. The past two months had been very hard on Duo. He did his duty as a bodyguard for Relena, but there was no life in his eyes. At first Relena offered him a shoulder to cry on and listen patiently to his wild ranting about Heero and Hilde. However, even Relena had her limits and she started to get angry with Duo and told him so. Strangely enough, this seemed to pull Duo out of his self-imposed gloom. In the last week his old humour started to return and from all appearances he was beginning to accept his life and the prospect of Heero and Hilde together. 

"But it only takes one little thing to bring reality crashing down on you." Relena murmured. She sighed again and grabbed a cloth from the kitchen to start mopping up the spilled whiskey. She dabbed gingerly at the carpet, wrinkling her nose as the fumes assaulted her. "Ugh... this place is going to smell like a still!" 

"Well, we won't be around to worry about it for the next few days." 

Relena looked up and saw Duo slouching in his bedroom doorway. He looked slightly sheepish and was fiddling with his braid. 

Standing up, Relena folded her arms. "Does this mean that you _want_ to go to the wedding?" She asked cautiously. 

Duo slouched even further. "It's not a question of wanting to go," he said. "But I think that I _should_ go. Maybe this wedding will be the thing that gives me a kick up the rear and helps me move on." 

*Or causes you even more pain* Relena thought and frowned. "Well, you might be right." 

Duo crossed over to her and pulled her hands into his. He looked intently into her face. "Oi, oi... you _were_ intending to go, right? I'm not pushing you into something you don't want to do?" 

"Oh... yes, I'm going," she told him quickly. "You know it's different for me, Duo. Heero and I never... committed ourselves like you and Hilde did." 

"Yeah, but you still love him." Duo said and Relena winced at his use of the present tense. "Relena... " Duo squeezed her hands, headless of the wet cloth she held. "You've been a real friend, and I don't know if I can ever pay you back..." 

"I don't want payment!" Relena said firmly. "Duo, I _want_ to help you!" She attempted to lighten the mood by smiling slightly and joking. "Besides, I'm doing everyone a big favour by keeping the God of Death from going on a rampage!" 

Duo grinned at her use of his old name. "Yeah, well... if you only knew how many nights I've dreamt of going up against Heero in Deathscythe and..." he coughed and stopped as Relena's eyebrows shot up. "Er... yeah... well..." 

Relena's eyes searched his. "Do you still hate him that much?" She asked softly. 

Duo didn't answer but his eyes spoke eloquently. 

"Duo..." Relena took in a deep breath and let it out slowly before proceeding. "You and Heero used to be so close... perhaps while you're mending the bridges between you and Hilde, you could give some thought to closing the gulf between you and Heero?" 

Duo was silent and then he sighed. "I-I don't know if that's possible..." 

"Can't you try?" Relena pushed him. "You both shared so much, and you were friends despite your differences. Surely you don't want to let that go?" 

"I don't know." Duo repeated. He shrugged. "Maybe when I stop wanting to smash his face in when I see him THEN we could... communicate." 

Relena dropped the subject. She had done her best and planted the idea in Duo's mind. The rest was up to him... and Heero. 

* * *

[Go ON to PART ONE][1]

[Go BACK to the Gundam Wing fanfiction index][2]   


   [1]: memory1.html
   [2]: gundamindex.htm



	2. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

  
  
  


* * *

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ However, Sophy Winner does belong to me. 

***   
Got to get you out   
of my mind,   
But I can't escape from the feeling.   
As I try to leave the memory behind   
Without you what's left to   
believe in?   
(Out of My Mind ~ Duran Duran) 

* * *

  
Part One: 

Heero sat bolt upright on his chair and tried to looked calm. This was not easy as his insides were churning with a sensation he had hardly ever encountered… he was nervous. 

"Stop pulling at your tie." His best man scolded him. "It will come undone… _again_." 

Heero quickly moved his hand away from his collar, he had not been aware that he was showing any outward signs of his inner turmoil. "It's tight." He said shortly. 

Wufei shot him a disbelieving look, but said nothing. However, Quatre laughed. "Isn't that the common complaint of all grooms?" He asked. 

Trowa shrugged slightly. "Only Wufei could confirm." He said. 

The Chinese man's expression was superior. "I was not nervous." He said loftily. "I knew _exactly_ what I was doing." 

Heero barely listened to his friends as he once more began to dwell on his wedding. The road leading to this day had been fraught with emotion over the last two months. Several times he had considered halting the plans and putting the date off, but Hilde always insisted that they go through with the wedding as they had planned six months ago. Heero rubbed the back of his neck. It wasn't that he didn't want to marry Hilde… he did. He knew that he loved her with everything he had and that she returned his feelings, but neither of them could completely dismiss the two other people who had been most hurt by their engagement. Heero's eyes darkened. As much as he disliked the thought, he couldn't help thinking that everything would have been much easier if Duo had just stayed _dead_. 

Someone moved into his line of vision and he glanced up to see Lady Une before him. She smiled, but there was worry in her eyes and she looked briefly over her shoulder before speaking. 

"Heero, you have some visitors..." 

He looked past her and his eyes widened. 

"Hey Heero, old pal, buddy!" Duo's smile was wide and almost manic and his violet eyes sparked with an emotion close to anger. Beside him, Relena was calm and composed, but her eyes flicked over to Duo frequently and there was concern in their depths. 

"Duo…" Heero breathed. "Why are you here?" 

"I was invited." Duo flourished the wedding invitation. "So I decided the drop by and offer my congratulations." He said in a bitter tone. 

Trowa, Quatre and Wufei all glanced uneasily at each other and Lady Une's eyes flashed between the two men. Relena stepped forward and smiled at Heero. "I really hope you'll both be happy." She said sincerely. 

"Oh I'm sure they will be, Relena." Duo bared his teeth at Heero. "Like two little lovebirds cooing in a nest." 

Heero's eyes narrowed. "What are you trying to do, Duo?" 

"Me, do anything?" Duo's expression was all innocence. "I'm just being a _good_ friend." The snarl was back in his voice. "Just like you were, Heero." 

Relena moved sharply then, jabbing her elbow into Duo's ribs. He yelped and turned to her. "What the hell was that for?" 

"Is this what you call good behaviour?" She demanded. "You should be over this spoilt baby act by now." 

For a minute it looked as if Duo was going to protest, but he met Relena's eyes and his expression turned to one of guilt. He cleared his throat and looked back at Heero. "So… where's Hilde?" 

"Getting ready." Heero said shortly. He shot Duo one of his forbidding glares. "Don't you dare upset her." 

Duo's shoulders slumped slightly. "Why would I want to upset her? I just want… to see her… say goodby… good luck." He amended. 

*You already said goodbye to her* Heero thought *Why do you want to upset her more?* He was going to object further when Relena caught his eye. She smiled encouragingly, indicating that she would keep Duo in line. "Then you should go." Heero told Duo. "The ceremony starts in fifteen minutes." 

There was a short and acutely uncomfortable silence. Duo ran his fingers through his fringe and toyed briefly with his shoulder-length braid. "Right." He said. He glanced at the other men and managed a slight smile. "I'll see you guys later." 

"You're staying for the ceremony?" Quatre blurted. 

Duo's smile turned into an almost wicked grin. "I wouldn't miss it!" He said in parting as he walked out of the door. 

Relena sighed. "I'm sorry." She said. "I should have known…" She stopped and shook her head. "I'm sorry," she repeated and then smiled at Heero, a sad yet gracious tilt of her lips. "Good luck, Heero." 

Heero stared at the door for quite a while after she had left, while his friends muttered behind him and Une watched him closely. "Heero?" 

He glanced at her. "I didn't expect them to come." He said. "Relena, perhaps, but not Duo. Not so soon." 

"Perhaps he thought it would help." Une suggested. 

Heero frowned and said nothing. Perhaps… but Duo was obviously still in pain and striking out at the nearest targets. Heero clenched his fists. If Duo hurt Hilde… 

In the corridor outside, Relena startled Duo by turning on him and shoving him against the wall. "You did it again, Duo." She said, her tone equally disappointed and angry. "You lost control." 

"Rel…" 

She didn't let him get her name out. "I'm not going to let you take on step further, until you pull yourself together! I refuse to witness a repeat scene with Hilde!" 

Pain shot through Duo's eyes. "I said I wouldn't hurt Hilde and I meant it." 

Relena sighed. "Yes Duo, I know… but sometimes your emotions get the better of your brain." She smiled up at him. "Duo, I know that you're not the fool some people believe you to be, please don't let your mouth run away when we go to see Hilde?" 

"I'll play nice." Duo promised and then stared at her intently. "What about you? Are you _sure_ that you want to come with me?" 

"Like I said before, someone needs to keep you under control." Relena's tones were light, but under Duo's gaze her expression saddened. "Yes, Duo… it hurts, but I'm a politician, I know how to smile sweetly and hide the pain inside. Hilde will only get good wishes from me." 

Without warning, Duo moved and embraced her. He held her close, his cheek against her hair. "I'm sorry, 'Lena." 

Relena recovered from her surprise and smiled into the hollow of his neck. "Sorry is easy to say, Duo. Try to put your regret into actions." 

He released her, his old quirky smile back in place. "Yes, Ms Vice-Foreign Minister!" 

*** 

Hilde Schbeiker swallowed as the pearls were clasped around her throat. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest, almost threatening to burst from her chest. She couldn't believe how nervous she was feeling, after all, she _wanted_ this wedding, wanted it with all her heart. 

"Don't worry, Hilde." Sally's long fingers rested on her bare shoulders. "It's natural to be nervous on your wedding day." 

Hilde glanced at the older woman. "So nervous that you feel sick?" She asked and Sally nodded. Hilde put a hand to her stomach. "Well… I hope it goes away before the ceremony." 

"Yeah," Catherine Bloom laughed. "I don't think Heero would appreciate his bride being sick through the ceremony!" 

"Laugh all you can Cathy," Sophy Winner, one of Quatre's numerous sisters, smirked. "Soon it might be you standing where Hilde is now and trying not to be sick with nerves!" 

Catherine blushed slightly as the other women laughed. In this atmosphere of good will, Hilde felt her nerves dissipate and she began to look forward to the wedding ceremony in a better state of mind. 

Sally finished styling Hilde's hair and gently put the veil in place. "I'll tell you one thing, ladies," she said, her blue eyes sparkling with humour. "Wedding nerves are _nothing_ compared to morning sickness!" She patted her huge stomach with a wry smile. 

"Or swollen ankles?" Sophy grinned up at Sally who rolled her eyes. 

"Let's just say, I'm going to be happy when this month is over." She commented. "I…" 

Sally was cut off by a knock at the door which opened to admit two familiar people. Hilde let out a little gasp of surprise. "Relena… Duo…" 

Sally looked at Catherine and Sophy and they nodded. "Nice to see you, Relena… Duo." Sally said with a smile. "But I think it would be better if we left you alone?" 

Relena shot Sally a grateful look. "Yes… if… Hilde doesn't mind…" 

Mutely Hilde shook her head. Duo smiled at Sally. "Congratulations on getting Wu-man down the aisle, Sally." He said. "How long before the baby's due?" 

"One month." Sally replied. She held Duo's eyes with her own as she passed him. "Be nice, Duo." She murmured softly. "Please." 

Duo nodded and waited until the three women had left. Hilde shook herself out of her paralysis and moved forward, her hands outstretched. "Duo! I didn't think you'd come… but… I'm so happy that you did!" She hugged him. 

Faced with such a greeting, all the vindictive words and angry feelings fled out of Duo. Slowly his arms lifted and encircled her tiny frame in the white satin dress. "I couldn't miss your wedding, Hilde." He said softly. "Even if I'm not the star attraction." 

She looked up at him, a slight frown at his words, but saw nothing except gentle teasing in his face. "I was afraid that you'd still be too hurt…" She moved back and glanced at Relena. "Both of you…" 

Relena's smile was genuine. "Hilde… I made my peace a while ago, all I hope is that you'll be happy." 

"I _am_ happy." Hilde insisted. "Even more so now that you two are here!" She looked back at Duo. "Have you… seen Heero?" She asked, a little tremor in her voice. 

Duo's jaw tightened. Thinking about Heero made the bad feelings return again. It had been easy when Hilde hugged him to imagine that she was all dressed up for him… or some faceless stranger who Duo had no connections with. "I… saw him." 

The happiness left Hilde's face. "Duo, you didn't…" 

"I'll see you at the ceremony." He said abruptly and fled out of the door, nearly crashing into Catherine and Sophy 

"Duo!" Hilde cried after him. She turned to Relena. "What happened? What did Duo do to Heero?" 

"Nothing!" Relena hastily reassured the other woman. "Duo just… acted up a little… we left before things got out of hand." 

Hilde turned away. "I shouldn't have invited him." 

"He would have been even more hurt if you hadn't." Relena said softly. "At least this way he has to face facts." She swallowed. "I hope you and Heero will be happy, Hilde, I really do." 

"Thank you." Hilde whispered. "Relena?" 

Relena halted at the door. "Yes?" 

"I'm sorry that we hurt you too." 

Relena smiled. "Don't worry about it…" She said as she slipped away, leaving Hilde to her thoughts. 

* * *

[Go ON to PART TWO][1]

[Go BACK to the Gundam Wing fanfiction index][2]   


   [1]: memory2.html
   [2]: gundamindex.htm



	3. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

* * *

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only   
borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ 

***   
Got to get you out   
of my mind,   
But I can't escape from the feeling.   
As I try to leave the memory behind   
Without you what's left to   
believe in?   
(Out of My Mind ~ Duran Duran) 

* * *

Part two 

*** 

It didn't take Relena long to find Duo, although she heard him long before she saw him. He was outside the chapel, hitting the wall repeatedly as he swore violently, matching the pace of his strike. Relena stood a little away from him and waited until he became aware of her presence. He turned and stared at her, his violet eyes wet with tears that he refused to shed. 

"I screwed up again." Duo said heavily. "Is Hilde…" 

"I said that you didn't do anything to Heero… she'll be fine." Relena said. "But Duo, perhaps you should go back to the hotel." 

He shook his head. "I'm going to see this thing through, Relena." 

She wanted to tell him he was crazy, that he was only forcing more pain on his overburdened soul, but in some twisted way Relena understood his actions. The first couple of months after Heero and Hilde had told her of their engagement she had forced herself to see them. She still recalled the pain in her heart and the hideously long and uncomfortable silences that frequently occurred. It was only later, after she had pulled back and thrown herself in her work, that she began to deaden the pain. So, Relena understood Duo's painful desire to attend the wedding, she was probably the only one who could. 

"Very well," Relena looked at the entrance to the chapel. "If we're going to attend then we should get moving. The ceremony starts soon." 

Duo went slightly white around the jaw, but he nodded. "Right." He rubbed his scraped knuckles. "I'll… take a seat at the back." 

"So will I." 

He stared at her. "Relena, you don't have to…" 

She regarded him coolly. "Perhaps I want to, Duo. Have you thought of that?" 

Duo's face was sheepish. "I'm being a selfish jerk, Relena. Sure, let's sit there together." 

Her smile returned, slightly sad but also vaguely amused. "Just like the old saying, misery loves company." 

Duo laughed. "And this misery couldn't have asked for better." He offered her his arm. "Ms Darlian?" 

She took up the offer. "Thank you, Mr Maxwell." 

*** 

The wedding ceremony was very simple. Heero and Hilde had agreed that they wanted a quiet wedding with just a few friends in attendance. Since neither had any family, Hilde was escorted down the aisle by Rashid of the Maguanac corps. She wore a very plain, white satin wedding dress and carried some pale yellow roses. A string of pearls encircled her neck and a delicate veil   
was fixed on her black hair. 

Duo's breath caught in his throat as she walked past him. Yes, he had seen her earlier in this dress, but somehow it was different now watching her. There was a glow on her face that turned her from a pretty woman into a beautiful one, but Duo was painfully aware that someone else was responsible   
for that glow. 

That person stood by the minister with Wufei. Dressed in a dark navy tuxedo, his unruly brown hair tamed, Heero looked extremely handsome... and obviously happy. His eyes met Hilde's as she approached and they turned to face the minister. 

Duo exhaled harshly. He knew this scene... but it was different from the fantasies he had indulged in while he worked on escaping the mines. *I was a fool...* he thought *I should've told Hilde... asked her to marry me _before_ I left.* But would it have made a difference? He couldn't help wondering whether Heero and Hilde would have fallen in love no matter what Duo might have said. *Would we be in the same situation, but with more guilt to carry between us?* 

He glanced over at Relena and saw she was staring straight ahead, her eyes firmly fixed on the bridal couple. Relena's strength awed him, no, _shamed_ him. Relena had not lived with Heero and she was never sure that he held her in the same regard that she held him, but that didn't make her pain any less than Duo's. Yet Relena was doing her best to remain a friend to Heero and Hilde, to support them and ease the tension that had developed in the wake of Duo's return. He reached across and took her hand, squeezing it gently, trying to convey in the gesture what he couldn't put into words. She glanced at him and he saw a watery sheen in her eyes, but her lips curved gently and   
she nodded. 

*How strange,* Duo thought *Of all of the pilots I talk the most, but when it comes to expressing my feelings I have no words... Or I just say the wrong thing.* He recalled, with a wince, the way he had yelled at Hilde after she had risked her life to get Libra's data. *Would it have killed me   
to say thank you?* He questioned himself *She could've died, and the last thing she would hear was 'You stupid idiot!'* 

The minister spoke up now, asking if there were any objections to the union. There was a short, profound silence and all the guests seemed to be holding their breath and waiting. Duo bit down on his tongue. He refused to screw up again. After what seemed like an age, the minister completed the ceremony. 

"I now pronounce you husband and wife." 

That short sentence was like a death knell to the last of Duo's vague hopes. As Heero and Hilde moved towards each other to seal their union, he closed his eyes, not wanting to see even though his traitorous brain threw taunting images at him. Relena's hand was an anchor to sanity and he didn't realise how hard he was holding it until she gasped in pain. He started to release her hand, but she grasped him, holding him equally as tightly. They sat in the darkness as the bridal couple left and the other guests exited. Neither said a word. 

*** 

Like the wedding, the reception was intended to be a simple affair. However Quatre got a little carried away after offering to organise it and the event was now taking place in the ball room of a huge yacht. Duo's jaw dropped to his chest as they walked in. 

"Holy crap!" He muttered. "I can hardly believe that we're on a boat!" 

Relena, who was used to this sort of thing, laughed at his astonishment. "It's a beautiful set-up." She looked at the band, the waiters, the tables groaning with food and the huge 15 tier wedding cake. "Quatre's out-done himself." 

They noticed Sally waving at them and approached her. The blond woman was ensconced on a comfortable chair with a glass of water in her hand. Noticing Relena looking at the glass, Sally grinned. "No alcohol allowed." She explained. "Along with a bunch of other things which makes baby do flips." 

Relena giggled briefly. "Are you going to have a binge after the baby's born, Sally?" 

Sally sighed. "Probably not, I'll be too busy being a Mama." She looked at Duo and her expression grew serious. "Tell me, Duo Maxwell, are you a secret masochist?" 

Duo choked. "Wh-what?" he wheezed. "No!" 

"You could have fooled me," Sally raised an eyebrow. "The way you are making yourself suffer here." 

"I was invited." Duo said. "Hilde wanted me to come." 

"True, true... but is it really necessary to keep twisting the knife?" Sally's eyes were filled with concern. "Duo... we can all see you're hurting, and no one blames you, but surely you've done enough for today?" 

Duo frowned. "I said that I would see this through, and I intend to do that. I can handle this just fine..." He stopped as Heero and Hilde walked into the room and their appearance turned him into a liar. 

*I don't think I've ever see Heero so relaxed* Relena thought with a pang. All the sappy stories about newlyweds being in a world of their own was true here. With a little sigh, Relena let go completely, burying the regrets and sorrow, and accepting the situation. 

Duo, on the other hand... 

Hilde's smiling mouth, her head tilted to look up at Heero, the loving way her fingers twined in his, and Heero's answering smile stabbed Duo anew. "I think..." He said faintly. "That you're right, Sally." He looked at Relena and gave her a bitter smile as he saw the acceptance in her eyes. "I take it   
you're staying?" 

She nodded. "I'll see you later, Duo?" 

"Yeah... later." Duo walked away... towards Heero and Hilde. 

Relena gasped and moved forward, but Sally reached out and held her back. "Let him go, Relena." She said firmly. "I don't think he's going to do anything foolish." 

Duo winced inwardly as he approached Heero and Hilde. The worried look in Hilde's eyes and the way Heero's expression took on a grim cast was almost as painful as watching them together. But Duo could hardly blame them for being suspicious, after all, he had hardly been a shining example of tact. 

Stopping before them, Duo forced a smile. "Uh... I just wanted to say..." He paused as various possible options flashed through his mind *Congratulations? Wish it was me? Heero, I will kill you?* Duo swallowed. "Be happy." He said and turned away, half-running out of the door. 

Relena watched the confusion from across the room. Heero made as if to follow Duo, but then changed his mind, while Hilde looked unsettled and fiddled nervously with her pearls. Sally shook her head. "That young man always makes a stir." 

"Do you think he'll be alright, Sally? By himself?" Relena asked anxiously. "I don't want him to do anything foolish..." 

Sally's smile was reassuring. "I think some time alone would do him good." She said thoughtfully. "You've been doing a great job looking after him, Relena, but it wouldn't do you or Duo any good if he became too dependant on your support." Gently Sally hugged Relena. "Try and enjoy yourself tonight, okay?" 

Taking a deep breath, Relena nodded. "I'll try," she said with a faint smile. 

*** 

When the taxi pulled up to the hotel it was past midnight and Relena was half-asleep in the back. After paying the driver, she got out and walked inside. Her drowsiness fell away from her rapidly as she ascended in the lift and her thoughts returned to Duo. _Was_ he alright? Or had he turned to   
alcohol again to drown his sorrows? 

As she inserted her key into the lock, Relena glanced at Duo's door. She considered knocking, but decided to wait a little. Inside her own room, Relena threw her coat on the bed and then joined it, flinging herself across the coverlet. She lay on her back and thought back on the evening. 

Contrary with her expectations, Relena had enjoyed the reception. Wufei's best man speech had been hilarious, even though he hadn't meant it to be so. The food was lovely and Relena had not lacked a partner in the dancing that followed. She even danced with Heero, and was gratified to discover that she no longer felt the urge to cry. *Perhaps I AM over him now* She mused. With   
a sigh, Relena rolled over onto her stomach and gathered the courage to visit Duo. 

It was dark inside Duo's room. She whispered his name, but there was no answer. Cautiously, Relena crept towards the bed and her heart stilled when she saw in was unoccupied. "Duo..." 

Before she could panic further, a white envelope caught her eye. She picked it up and switched on the beside lamp. In the dim glow, Relena read her name, and with trembling fingers she opened it, sitting down on the empty bed to read the letter within. 

//Relena, I knew you would check up on me, so I felt safe leaving this in my room. Anyway, I want to assure you that this isn't a suicide note or anything stupid like that, I'm not that depressed, okay? No, scratch that, I AM fucking depressed, but I'm not taking my life over it. Tonight made me   
realise that it's going to take a lot longer than we all thought for me to get my head clear on this. And it's not fair to you to have to look after me while I angst about the whole Hilde issue. So I'm taking off for a while. It won't be long, well, not too long, but I think some wandering will help clear my head. Sorry for running out on you like this, I understand if you're mad, but I hope you realise why I'm doing this. I'll keep in touch, I promise, if only to make sure ya don't think I'm dead (again)! Take care of yourself, Relena. Don't work too hard and make sure you have some fun every   
now and then, okay? Your ever grateful God of Death, Duo Maxwell.// 

"Duo..." Relena whispered again and tears slid down her cheeks to hit the paper. "Find your peace quickly," she urged. "And then come back to me." 

* * *

Go ON to PART THREE 

[Go BACK to the Gundam Wing fanfiction index][1]   


   [1]: gundamindex.htm



	4. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

* * *

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only   
borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ 

* * *

  
//Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide   
Voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time   
The night is my companion and solitude my guide   
Would I spend forever here and not be satisfied 

And I would be the one to hold you down   
Kiss you so hard   
I'll take your breath away   
And after I'd wipe away the tears   
Just close your eyes dear 

Through this world I've stumbled so many times betrayed   
Trying to find an honest word, to find the truth enslaved   
Oh you speak to me in riddles and you speak to me in rhyme   
My body aches to breathe your breath, your words keep me alive 

And I would be the one to hold you down   
Kiss you so hard   
I'll take your breath away   
And after I'd wipe away the tears   
Just close your eyes dear//   
(Possession - Sarah Mclachlan) 

* * *

  
Part three 

*** 

Over the next few months Relena threw herself into her work, letting the politics bury her so that she had less time to dwell on her feelings. She discovered that she missed Duo, more than she thought she would and that unsettled her so much that she worked even harder. Duo kept his promise and sent regular communications to her, but they were little more than postcards   
assuring her that he was alive and well, and Relena couldn't stop herself from worrying about his state of mind after receiving them. 

Nearly one year after Duo's departure events found Relena in her office with Dorothy Catalonia, frantically trying to complete a report before attending a trade conference on L4. For the best part of the morning the two women worked in silence, until Dorothy broke it with an unexpected question. 

"So what are you going to get Heero and Hilde for an anniversary present?" 

Relena blinked and looked up from the report. "What?" 

Dorothy regarded her with a slight, amused smile on her lips. "You do remember that it will be the Yuy's first anniversary in four days time?" 

Relena's breath caught. Had that much time passed by already? Was it really nearly a year since Heero and Hilde married? 

"And Duo left..." She murmured. Dorothy frowned. 

"What? I didn't catch that." She questioned. 

Relena shook her head. "Nevermind, Dorothy. Er... so, anniversary, huh?" She leaned forward on her elbows, resting her chin on her hands. "Do you have any suggestions?" 

Dorothy snickered. "Yes... baby clothes." 

"Baby..." Relena's voice trailed away as she realised the implications of Dorothy's words. She sat upright and stared at the blond woman. "Hilde's _pregnant_?" 

Dorothy seemed to be taking a perverse enjoyment out of Relena's astonishment as she nodded vigorously. "Yes, one month I think. Apparently Heero is over the moon." 

Relena's eyes narrowed. "And just how did you find this information out, Dorothy? I hardly think it likely that Hilde would _tell_ you." 

Dorothy shrugged. "No, a little bird called Mariemaya told me." She admitted. "That child chatters quite a lot if you know the right thing to start her off." 

"Charming..." Relena muttered, but her mind was veering away from Dorothy's admission and walking down another road. It was rather odd to think of Heero as a prospective father, he didn't really strike Relena as the type to be enthused by children. However, Relena reminded herself, she had not considered Heero the type to fall in love with Hilde either. Relena felt a sadness she thought to be long gone jab at her heart. She remembered daydreams, only a few, that involved herself as the mother of a child with intense Prussian blue eyes. 

"Feeling alright, Miss Relena?" Dorothy's voice cut across her thoughts and Relena blinked. 

"Hmmm...? Oh, yes... uh... well, I'll look into some baby clothes." Relena said hurriedly, scribbling herself a note to avoid Dorothy's eyes. "Now, I think we should continue preparing these papers..." 

"Of course," Dorothy's tones were as smooth as chocolate, hiding the mix of amusement and concern inside of her. 

Relena turned her attention back to her report, but found that concentration eluded her. On top of her own astonishment was the worrying thought... *How do I break this to Duo, and how is he going to react?* 

***   
Quatre Raberba Winner tried to concentrate on the document in front of him, but once again his eyes blurred and obscured the type. He cursed softly and rubbed his eyes, angry at the intrusion of his feelings. He reached for a tissue and felt a box being shoved in his hand. 

"Thank you, I... aah!" Quatre exclaimed in surprise and looked up. "_Duo_?" 

The violet-eyed man grinned wickedly at him from across the desk. "A little absorbed in your work, Q-man?" He asked. "Or is something else on your mind?" 

Quatre slid away from the question and after quickly blowing his nose, he peppered Duo with questioned. "When did you get back? Where have you been?" And so on. 

"I got back on the slowest shuttle ever just this morning," Duo said. Lazily, he took a seat and stretched out his long legs, he had noticed Quatre's evasion, but decided to leave it... for now. "I've been all around the place, but for the last four months or so I've been on Mars." 

Quatre's eyebrows shot up. "_Mars_?" He said in astonishment. "The terraforming project?" 

Duo nodded. "It was..." He looked at his hands which Quatre could see were rough and callused. "Just something I felt like doing." He said and then grinned. "I could yell at the wheat and thump it around if I wanted to, no one answering me back... it was great." 

"How are Zechs... Milliardo... and Miss Noin doing?" Quatre asked, his private hell diverted by curiousity. "I take it that you met them?" 

"Met them, stayed with them, worked on their farm." Duo leaned back. "And it's not Miss Noin anymore, Quatre. She and Milliardo got married a while ago, it was quiet, but then he didn't really want to make a big song and dance about it." 

"You'll have to tell Relena," Quatre said and smiled as Duo straightened and his violet eyes widened. "She's here for the trade conference." 

Duo rubbed the back of his neck. "Hmmm... yeah... well, I bet she's a bit mad at me... for running out like I did." 

"I think she understood, Duo." Quatre reassured the other man. "She's never spoken of you with anything but affection." 

"Yeah?" Duo looked pleased. 

Quatre nodded. "Yes." He said firmly. 

Duo got to his feet and half-turned to go, then he paused and looked intently at Quatre. "By the way, why were you looking so down when I came in?" He asked. 

Quatre's eyes slid away from Duo's intent gaze. "It's nothing." 

"Nothing?" Duo shook his head and planted his hands on the desk, leaning forward. "So why do you look like your dog just died, huh? Or..." His tone softened. "As if your heart is breaking?" 

Quatre winced as Duo's words hit home and Duo sighed. "I've seen that look Quatre. I saw it in the mirror for a very long time, and even now it comes back occasionally." He admitted. "Catherine?" 

Quatre averted his gaze, not wanting to let Duo see his reaction to Catherine's name. "Duo... please..." 

"You guys had a fight." Duo stated, "And now neither will back down and apologise, am I right?" He folded his arms and shook his head. "Q-man, couples have fights ALL the time, Hilde and I..." He swallowed. "Hilde and I used to scrap a lot, but it was just a part of the relationship." 

Quatre made a helpless gesture as his resolution not to speak wavered. "I... we..." He faltered. "It's a little bit more than that..." 

"Spill it," Duo ordered. "You'll feel better if you do." 

Quatre sank further into his chair and rubbed his forehead. "It happened two days ago." he said. "The circus was here for the next three months and I attended all the performances, as usual. Anyway... that night... one of the ropes gave out and.." he shuddered at the memory. "Catherine fell and there was no safety net... I thought my heart was going to burst as I watched, helpless to stop her descent... But... Trowa, he caught her, just in time..." 

"Let me guess what happened next," Duo interrupted. "Once she was safe, your fear turned to anger?" 

Quatre nodded miserably. "I came to her trailer and I told her that she couldn't do this anymore, if she loved me..." 

Duo groaned. "You... aw man... Quatre, you idiot!" He slapped his brow. "You don't have to tell me anymore... I can _guess_ what happened after that stupid statement." He wagged a finger at Quatre who stiffened. "And you _know_ it was a dumb thing to say!" 

"I know... I know..." Quatre groaned. "But I... she won't speak to me Duo. I've called..." 

"No good," Duo shook his head. "The only option you have now is... crawling. Go and grovel at her feet, tell her that you're a moron and that you'll never order her about again. She might forgive you then." He reached out and put a hand on Quatre's shoulder. "But don't, for God's sake, leave things as they are. Don't make my mistake, Quatre..." 

***   
The circus was relatively quiet as Quatre entered the main tent. He looked back over his shoulder and Duo gave him a grin and the thumbs up. Drawing in a deep breath, Quatre straightened his shoulders and gripped the flowers in his hand tighter. He moved forward, his eyes darting around, searching for Catherine. One of the circus hands told him she was inside, but Quatre couldn't see her anywhere. 

"Try the top platform." 

Quatre jumped slightly and turned to see Trowa regarding him from the shadows. The emerald eyed man's expression was carefully neutral and Quatre's nerves increased. He had not seen Trowa since the incident and was unsure how his best friend was taking the whole thing. After all, Catherine was Trowa's sister... 

"Trowa, I..." He bit his lip and then attempted a faltering smile. "How are you?" 

"Fine." Trowa turned his head and nodded. "She's been up there most of the time. If you want to talk, then you'll have to go up too." 

Quatre followed Trowa's gaze and gulped. The top platform was the one right up by the roof of the tent, accessible via the main supporting pole. It was very, very high. On the platform was a small, hunched figure in pink... Catherine... 

The blond man's eyes narrowed and his lips thinned. "Right..." he said. "Then I _will_ go up!" And with that, Quatre strode over to the main pole and began to climb upwards. 

Duo, watching from the entrance, grinned. "Go Q-man!" He said and Trowa turned to him.   
"So this is your doing?" He asked and Duo shrugged. 

"I may have had something to do with it." he said. "Are you angry?" 

Trowa shook his head. "No. I knew Quatre didn't mean the things he said, but it's no good if I tell Catherine that. She needs to hear it from him." He glanced back. Quatre was two-thirds of the way up and Catherine was still oblivious to his approach. Trowa looked at Duo. "Thank you." He said softly. 

Duo scratched the back of his neck and fidgeted. "Aw... I couldn't just leave Quatre is a mess like that." He mumbled. "Someone should be happy..." 

Beyond them, Quatre reached his goal and was greeted by a surprised outcry from Catherine. Duo glanced up and grinned as Quatre plastered himself to the support, offering flowers and apologies to the stunned young woman. 

Trowa regarded Duo steadily. "Are you still that unhappy, Duo?" 

Duo blinked, a little taken aback by the sudden personal question from the normally reticent Trowa. He hesitated, not knowing exactly how to put his feelings into words. "I'm better." He said finally. 

"Good." Trowa looked beyond him and a slight smile curved his lips. "I'll see you later." He nodded, not just to Duo, and then slipped away. 

Duo whirled on whoever it was listening in and his jaw dropped. 

Relena smiled. "Don't look so surprised, Duo." She said. "I always was good at tracking people down." 

* * *

[Go ON to PART FOUR][1]

[Go BACK to the Gundam Wing fanfiction index][2]   


   [1]: memory4.html
   [2]: gundamindex.htm



	5. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

* * *

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only   
borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ 

*** 

//Through this world I've stumbled so many times betrayed   
Trying to find an honest word, to find the truth enslaved   
Oh you speak to me in riddles and you speak to me in rhyme   
My body aches to breathe your breath, your words keep me alive// 

***   
Part 4   
***   
September AC 203 

"Relena!" Duo swallowed his surprise and moved forward, picking Relena up   
and giving her a great bear hug that left her gasping for breath. "Man, it's   
_great_ to see you!" 

She patted his shoulder and laugh. "I feel the same, but... could you put me   
down now?" 

Smiling sheepishly, Duo set Relena gently down. They both eyed each other,   
looking at the changes the year had wrought in them. Relena was pleased with   
what she saw. Duo's eyes were no longer so haunted, his hair was longer and   
he had started to braid it back once more, and his frame was no longer so   
wasted but nicely filled out with lean muscle. Her lingering doubts about   
the wisdom of his decision to wander were swept away; clearly Duo had   
discovered some form of peace. However, she was naggingly aware that he, as   
yet, was ignorant of the impending new arrival to the Yuy household, and she   
was worried that the news might undo all that his sabbatical had achieved. 

Duo frowned slightly as he regarded Relena. She was clearly pleased to see   
him, but he saw the weariness in her face and she was thinner too. He   
recognised the signs of a body that was being pushed to hard and fast, and   
he shook his head. Relena's eyes widened. "What's wrong Duo?" She asked,   
afraid that she had read him wrongly and he was still depressed. 

He wagged a finger in her face. "You've been overworking, haven't you,   
Princess?" He scolded. "And after I _told_ you to get out and enjoy life!" 

Relief flowed through her and she laughed. "It's not that easy..." Relena   
protested. "This has been a very busy year for me!" 

Duo leaned forward. "I don't believe you." He said firmly. "You're a   
workaholic, Relena, who won't look up from the paper work unless someone   
prods you to do so!" 

"Well, then I guess you got back just in time!" Relena said tartly. 

"Looks like I did." Duo agreed. "Come on, you must have blocked aside some   
time to come here, and now you've found me we can use that time to have   
lunch and catch up." 

Relena surrendered. "Very well, Duo, I place myself in your hands." She   
said. "But I need to swing by the hotel and pick up a couple of things   
first." 

Twenty minutes later, Duo lounged in the sitting room of Relena's suite   
waiting for her to return. As they approached the room, one of the trade   
ministers waylaid them and asked Relena to spare five minutes. Duo frowned   
and idly kicked the coffee table leg. *Five minutes, my ass!* He looked at   
the clock and his frown deepened. *Damned leeches... sucking her dry.* He   
wondered what the reaction would be if he kidnapped Relena for a few days   
and spirited her away to a holiday beach. *Would the universe really   
collapse if she wasn't around? She's not the Queen of the World anymore,   
surely _someone_ else can be relied on?* 

The door opened and Duo sat up. "Hey 'Lena, did that old..." His voice   
trailed away when Dorothy Catalonia entered. 

Dorothy's eyebrows shot up in surprise and then she smiled. "Well, well...   
the prodigal returns." 

Duo flashed her a careless grin. "Well, well... still as catty as ever."   
Dorothy scowled at him and Duo made a mischievous face at her. "What's up,   
Dorothy? Relena's been hijacked by some old fart." 

"I thought so." Dorothy held up a small package. "Duo, can you give this to   
her and say that it was the best I could find?" She checked her watch. "I   
have a lunch appointment now that I must go to... as much as I'd love to   
stay and enjoy a scintillating conversation with you." She mocked and tossed   
Duo the package. 

Duo deftly caught it. "Dorothy, the regret of missing a chat with you will   
haunt me forever." He moaned dramatically. She snorted and left, slamming   
the door behind her. 

Duo grinned. "Success!" He glanced at the package curiously and shrugged.   
None of his business really he told himself but he still squeezed it gently.   
There was a muffled, squeaky sound and Duo's curiousity sharpened. Almost   
without thinking, he opened pulled it open and mentally justified his   
actions by reminding himself that he was still nominally Relena's bodyguard   
and it was his duty to check for all possible dangers. 

"What the fuck...?" Duo held up the small items and goggled at them in   
disbelief. "Baby clothes?" He turned the romper suit around in his hands and   
then picked up the small toy which squeaked when squeezed. "Why would   
Relena...?" 

He flinched at the thought which flashed through his mind. Relena did look   
peaky... could she be pregnant? And if so... _who_ was the father? Duo was   
sure he would have heard from Millardo if Relena had married, mail was slow   
between Earth and Mars, but not _that_ slow. Duo's fingers clenched into a   
fist, crushing the tiny garment. He felt a hot boiling rage well up within   
as his mind conjured up images of Relena and some faceless man. No, it   
couldn't be... he _had_ to be wrong! These things were for someone elses   
baby... maybe Wufei and Sally's kid... Duo shook his head. No, the Changs'   
baby girl would be too big for this now, the romper suit was obviously   
designed for a newborn baby. 

Relena burst in, a little breathless and smiling. "Duo, I'm sorry that took   
longer than I expected. I'm ready to go... Duo?" She approached him, taking   
note of his abstracted look and the baby clothes in his hands. 

Duo jumped slightly. "I... I..." He started to hide the garments behind his   
back, but stopped and held them out to her. "Dorothy delivered them... she   
said that they were the best she could find." 

"Oh." Relena took the clothes. She glanced at his troubled expression and   
wondered if Dorothy had told him _who_ they were for. "Did she say anything   
else?" 

Duo shook his head. "Er... no." His eyes wandered involuntarily down to   
Relena's abdomen. 

Relena blinked and then realised what Duo was thinking. Her lips twitched   
and then she couldn't hold it in any longer, so she laughed. Duo's eyes   
widened and he stared at her, wondering what was so funny. Relena pointed a   
shaky finger at the baby clothes and gasped. "You... thought... you... I   
was..." 

Duo went red. "Argh!" He cried and threw himself on the sofa, putting a   
cushion over his face and wrapping his arms around it. "I'm such a moron!"   
He moaned, muffled by the cushion. 

Relena composed herself and sat on the edge of the sofa. She patted his arm   
and then tried to pull the cushion away. "It's an understandable mistake to   
make, Duo. You haven't seen me for a year, but I assure you that the baby   
these clothes are intended for is not mine." 

Duo was silent beneath the cushion, although he didn't relax his grip. He   
sighed heavily. "It's Heero and Hilde's, right?" 

Relena looked at her hands. "Yes." She said softly. "Hilde's going to have a   
baby in eight months time." 

Duo didn't make a sound, he just lay there, his expression hidden by the   
cushion. Relena licked her lips. "Do you want to stay here?" She asked. "I   
understand if you don't want to go out right now." 

"No, no... we're still going out for lunch." Duo was firm. "Just... give me   
five minutes, okay?" 

"Sure." Relena stood up, grabbing the baby clothes and the toy. "I need to   
change anyway. Just knock on my bedroom door when you're ready." 

Duo listened to her footsteps fade away and the door shut behind her, and   
then removed the cushion from his face. He stared up at the ornate ceiling   
and blew his bangs out of his eyes. "A baby, huh?" 

His mind was numb, no pain, no anger... just a disconcerting absence of   
emotion. Perhaps his wanderings had finally distanced him from the issue.   
Perhaps he was finally over Hilde. Perhaps he... 

"Aw, screw it!" Duo sat up, violently throwing the sofa cushion across the   
room. He _did_ feel an emotion, and it wasn't anger or sorrow. He was   
_envious_. Heero Yuy had already taken everything Duo wanted, and now he was   
going to be a father, to Hilde's baby, to the baby that should have been   
Duo's. The envy churned Duo's stomach... yeah, Heero Yuy had it all and what   
was Duo Maxwell's lot? Turned into a roving bum with little prospects and no   
Hilde to share his life. His shoulders slumpec and he buried his face in his   
hands, exhaling sharply. "It's just not fucking _fair_!" 

"I'm not going to eat with someone who's sunk into self-pity." Relena spoke   
coolly behind him. 

Duo lifted his head and turned to face her. Relena folded her arms and shook   
her head. "I thought you never lied, Duo." She said calmly. "You told me   
that you had found peace, but from this reaction I can only conclude that   
you've been burying your hurt, not working through it." 

He stared at her, initially injured by the lack of sympathy and then   
uncomfortably aware of the truth in her words. Relena moved towards him, her   
expression softening as she neared. "I never meant for you to find out it   
such a way." She said. "I was planning to break the news in more gently and   
to give you some time to absorb it... although I didn't really anticipate   
such a violent reaction." Her gaze travelled to the cushion he had thrown. 

"I..." Duo faltered. He felt sick, mostly at his own display of childish   
rage prompted by such a low emotion like envy. The disappointment in   
Relena's eyes shot through him and he remembered all the resolutions he had   
made to himself on the journey to L4. Resolutions that he had already   
started to break. "I'm sorry Relena, I really did think that I wouldn't act   
like this again." His lips curved into a weary, rueful smile. "I psyched   
myself up on the way back here, told myself that I could now walk up to   
Heero and Hilde and tell them sincerely that I was happy for them." 

Relena sighed. "And the information about the baby changed all that..." Her   
eyes met his. "Does that mean you'll go away again, Duo?" 

Duo shook his head. "No, no I'm not going to run away anymore... I _have_ to   
face facts and the baby, well, that's a _big_ fact. I'm not going to say   
that it hasn't hit me like a punch to the gut though." Duo laughed bitterly.   
"But Relena, although I'm not angry... I am _jealous_ of Heero... he's gonna   
be a Dad..." 

Relena's eyes widened in surprised. "Why Duo Maxwell... I never dreamed that   
you wanted children!" 

Duo laughed again, with amusement rather than bitterness now. "Well... I   
don't know about most people, but I factored in the idea of kids when I   
thought about marrying Hilde." He shrugged. "I don't know... I just liked   
the idea of a rugrat of our own... doing the real family thing, you get what   
I mean?" 

Relena smiled and nodded slowly. "I get it, Duo." She blushed faintly. "Even   
if you're not contemplating marriage... perhaps it is something everyone   
who's in love thinks about?" 

She was quickly encircled in Duo's arms and wound up with her cheek pressed   
against his leather-clad shoulder as he hugged her tightly. "So it was a big   
shock to you too, huh Princess?" 

Relena's laugh was shaky. "Y-yes." She admitted. "I mean... I half-expected   
them to start a family at _some_ point, but not so soon!" 

Duo grinned. "Maybe it was an accident." He chuckled. "Man, the look on   
Heero's face would've been priceless!" He stepped back, releasing Relena,   
but his hands lingered on her shoulders. "You okay?" 

"M-me?" Relena stared at him. "I should be asking you that question!   
_You're_ the one who was upset earlier!" 

Duo shrugged. "I can't hold onto the anger, Relena. If I learnt anything   
during my travels it was that... I've got to keep on living, which is why I   
returned. I'm going to make a new start and get a new job." He met her eyes.   
"And this time I'm not going to leech off you, 'Lena." 

"You never 'leeched' off me, Duo!" Relena snapped. "I needed your support as   
much as you need mine! And I didn't offer you a job out of pity... it was   
convenient for us both and I knew that you could do it!" She folded her arms   
and her lips curved slightly. "By the way, I still need a decent bodyguard." 

Duo, initially taken aback by her vehemence, grinned at her final words.   
"Well... if you're sure..." 

"I'm sure." Relena said firmly. "As long as you promise me that you'll come   
and talk to me if you ever feel the need, rather than bottling it up and   
then trying to drink away your sorrows." She reached out and laid a hand on   
his arm. "And that means starting from now." 

He was silent for a while, although he put his hand over hers. With a slight   
sigh, Duo nodded. "Okay, I promise." His smile returned and he sketched her   
a mock salute. "Now, would the Princess like her luncheon?" 

Relena matched his smile. "Certainly, Mr Maxwell." 

*** 

Hilde Yuy patted her still-flat stomach and hummed softly. For all the   
horror stories she had heard about pregnancy she was finding this remarkably   
easy so far. Her morning sickness was relatively minimal and she had yet to   
develop any strange cravings, she felt content and happy... and why not?   
Business was doing well, she had many friends and tomorrow would mark the   
end of her first year of marriage. Hilde certainly considered herself lucky. 

However, there was one thing that still nagged at her, sometimes causing her   
to wake with tears stinging her eyes. 

"Duo..." Hilde sighed, her euphoric feeling deflating. She poured hot water   
into two mugs and stirred the coffee, watching the liquid whirl as her mind   
wandered. 

The guilty feelings about Duo had not died over the year as she still   
vividly recalled the heartbreak in his eyes when she last saw him. Hilde   
wished there was some way that she could do something for Duo to make him   
happy once again, but what he wanted from her was something she could no   
longer give. And as for his animosity towards Heero... She shook her head,   
that was a problem which needed to be resolved and she had little idea how   
to do it. 

Picking up the coffee mugs, Hilde walked into the main room where Heero was   
correcting some of the bugs in a new system. He looked up when she set the   
mug beside him and she smiled. "Going well?" 

Heero nodded. "Should be done in another hour." He said and sipped his   
coffee. "What's wrong, koi?" He asked and Hilde laughed lightly. 

"Can't I have any secrets?" She teased, then she sobered. "I was just   
thinking about things..." 

The phone shrilled before Heero could question her further and Hilde picked   
it up, activating the video screen. She blinked as a familiar face appeared.   
"Duo?" 

Duo grinned. "Hey Hilde, you're looking good... despite being knocked-up!" 

"You... you know?" Hilde stuttered and Heero moved to stand beside her.   
Duo's eyes hardened but his smile didn't waver. 

"Heero," Duo nodded at the other man. "Looking forward to changing dirty   
diapers?" He shifted his gaze back to Hilde. "I just got back, and Relena   
told me. I thought I should congratulate you... both." 

Hilde's lips curved in a tremulous smile. "Thank you Duo, that means a lot   
to me... and to Heero." She glanced up at her husband. 

There was a long uncomfortable silence, then Duo shrugged. "Well... take   
care, Hilde." He quickly shut off the link and Hilde's bad feelings   
returned. 

"Why didn't you say anything, Heero?" She asked softly. 

Heero closed his eyes. "Because there was nothing I could say." 

* * *

[Go ON to PART FIVE][1]

[Go BACK to the Gundam Wing fanfiction index][2]   
  


   [1]: memory5.html
   [2]: gundamindex.htm



	6. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**

* * *

//We are young, heartache to heartache we stand   
No promises, no demands   
Love is a battlefield   
We are strong, no one can tell us we're wrong   
Searchin' our hearts for so long   
All of us knowing, love is a battlefield//   
[Love is a Battlefield - Pat Benatar] 

*** 

Part 5 

*** 

"Fuck Heero Yuy!" Duo flung Relena's bedroom door open violently and stormed into the room, his violet eyes flashing murderously. 

Relena sat up and eyed him nervously. "Things didn't go well?" She inquired. 

Duo took several deep breaths, trying to calm himself. "I never expected it to go _well_." He confessed. "But I would've appreciated something more than the fucking silent treatment from the fucking Perfect Soldier!" 

"What did Heero do?" Relena asked. "Did he say something?" 

"No. He didn't say a thing, he just looked at me as if I was going to reach through the screen and pull Hilde away from him!" Duo began to pace up and down, kicking the odd piece of furniture as he ranted. "I called to congratulate them! Would it have really hurt for him to have said SOMEthing?   
What kind of man does he take me for? Of course I don't LIKE him with Hilde! But that doesn't mean I'm going to crash into their lives and try to ABDUCT her!" He paused and turned, looking at Relena with pain-filled eyes. "Did I really mess things up that badly between us, 'Lena?" 

She opened her mouth to say something, but Duo held up a hand. "Ya know, on second thoughts... I really don't want to talk about it yet." He ran a hand through his bangs. "I might just... go for a walk and cool down... I really don't feel safe right now..." With an apologetic smile Duo exited, leaving   
Relena blinking in his wake. 

"Argh!" Relena made an explosive exclamation and flopped back down on her bed. Part of her wanted to run after Duo and check that he wouldn't do anything stupid, but she sharply reminded herself that she would do him no favours by smothering him with concern. So instead Relena focused her mind on Heero's behaviour and a possible explanation for his apparent coldness towards Duo. 

Had Duo ruined their friendship beyond repair during the early days after he returned? Surely Heero could understand that Duo's emotional pain had made him lose control! Relena frowned, there was one possible explanation, but it seemed so... silly. Was it remotely possible that Heero _was_ afraid that Hilde still loved Duo? 

Despite the changes in his life, Heero still remained quite stiff and serious. Certainly his association with Hilde had made him more 'human' and nowadays it was common to see him smile. He was also very handsome, fulfilling the promise of his teenage years, but was still quiet and morose at times. Compared to Duo's energetic charm and sexy smile, well... even Relena admitted that Heero could have caused to feel nervous. After all, Hilde _had_ fallen for Duo's charm once. It wasn't insane to believe that Heero was concerned about Duo's gorgeous violet eyes, well-turned out form,   
engaging smile and bright personality. Relena's minds-eye lingered on Duo and she smiled. He was very sexy and... 

"Oh!" Relena sat back up and swallowed. "What am I _thinking_?" 

She nibbled nervously on a fingernail. This was no time to start thinking of Duo as attractive, she told herself sternly, not when we're were both still recovering from the scars of lost love. Besides, Relena bit her lower lip, he would be very unlikely to fall for _me_ anyway. I'm completely different   
in looks and personality from Hilde for a start! And really, getting involved would only make things complicated. 

Relena got up and looked at her reflection in the mirror. "Duo Maxwell is your friend." She told her reflection firmly. "You like his company and are happy to be a _friend_ whom he can talk to. Mistaking physical attraction for anything else would be a bad idea and is exactly what you and Duo   
_don't_ need right now!" She sighed. "And furthermore, talking to myself is really not a good sign..." 

"Relena?" Dorothy popped her head around the door. "Are you alright?" 

Relena twitched. "Dorothy! Can't you learn to knock?" She demanded. 

Dorothy raised one eyebrow. "I did knock," she defended herself. "Twice. _Are_ you alright, Relena?" 

"Yes, yes. I'm fine, I was just thinking about... things." Relena blushed faintly and cursed inwardly as Dorothy smirked slightly. 

"Well, if you can take a break from these 'things', can you have a look a couple of reports?" She asked. 

Relena nodded. "Sure, I'll be right there." 

Still smirking Dorothy left and Relena resisted the urge to throw something after her. She drew in a deep breath and faced herself in the mirror again. "Friends," she reminded herself. "Just friends. Nothing more." 

With that definite statement, Relena turned away, but there was a whisper of doubt, as if her reflection was speaking quite clearly into her unwilling mind. 

"Liar." 

*** 

Thankfully for her peace of mind, over the next few months Relena was kept much too busy to dwell on her unwanted attraction to Duo. New trade agreements between Earth and the colonies were being hashed out while several smaller colonies grew beyond expectations and emergency conferences were called to deal with what was perceived as a cronic shortage of basic human rights. Relena was a frequent traveller, barely spending more than five days in one place and with relatively little time to relax. In fact, it was likely that she would have had no time for anything but work if not for Duo's efforts. 

Duo remained in Relena's staff as her bodyguard. He quickly made friends with all other guards, various secretaries and other miscellaneous, but necessary, people. The only person he clashed with, in any form, was Dorothy Catalonia. His pranks became legendary and were soon regarded as a vital way to liven up a boring flight, he was also a sympathetic listener for anyone feeling stressed, and he even managed to convince Pagan to try inline skating at one point. However, his primary target to relax and entertain was Relena. Frequently he would saunter into her office, yank her papers out of her hands and drag her off to enjoy herself. Relena saw more movies, played   
more games, ate at more burger bars and did more _fun_ things than she had ever done in her life. Yet, at the same time, Duo didn't let her over-exert herself either at work or play. Sometimes all he would do was bar the door while she slept, not even letting the most important minister disturb her. 

One warm evening in May 204 Relena and Duo walked back to the hotel where they were staying at a slow pace. In Relena's case it was also a slightly unsteady wobble. The circus had been touring the area for a few days and the last evening had nicely coincided with the resolution of a conference Relena was attending. Duo, despite her protests, had convinced Relena to join him, Trowa, Quatre and Catherine for a little celebration of a satisfactory conclusion to business for every one. The wine had flowed freely and Relena was now feeling the effects and clung to Duo's arm as her feet refused to obey her. 

"It's not fair," she complained. "You and Trowa were drinking like fishes and you're _fine_!" Me… I'm all woozy… and it's not like I don't drink champagne often enough!" 

Duo grinned. "Yeah, but at the functions you drink the champagne you always limit yourself to a glass and a half, tonight you had five glasses of cheap plonk. It makes a difference, princess." He grinned at her. 

Relena made a face at him and then looked up at the stars. "It's hard to believe," she murmured as her wine-hazed mind moved to another tangent. "That nine years have passed since the beginning of Operation Meteor." 

Duo blinked. "Really? Was it about now?" He scratched his head. "Wow…" 

"Yes, April 7th AC195, my birthday too…" Relena tilted her head to smile at him. "Amazing isn't it… how things change from what you believed then to what is happening now." 

"Yeah," Duo rolled his shoulders. "I didn't think I'd live this long, that's for certain." He snickered. "And I sure didn't expect to see Quatre with Catherine Bloom or Wufei a daddy!" 

"Mayling is so cute." Relena cooed as she was distracted onto another tangent. "I was so pleased that you managed to contact Wufei and Sally to attend my birthday party last month." She sighed. "One day… I hope I have a child…" 

Duo awkwardly put an arm around her shoulders as they entered the hotel. "You'd be a great mother, 'Lena." he assured her and she smiled ruefully. 

"Except at the moment I'm much to busy to even allow myself the luxuary of _thinking_ about it!" She pointed out. "It's all very well for Heero and Hilde…" Relena caught herself abruptly and glanced quickly at Duo. He laughed at the stricken expression on her face. 

"Hey, it's not taboo to say their names around me!" He said, guiding her down the corridor to their rooms. "I'm not gonna start running around like a lunatic and bashing my head against a wall!" 

"I should hope not," Relena mumbled as he opened her door. "That would be really painful… and probably very messy." 

Duo chuckled at her statement and helped her to the couch. A blinking light on the coffee table caught his eyes. "You've got a message." He said. "Do you want to hear it now?" 

Relena managed to sit up straighter and nodded wearily. "I should, just in case it's something urgent…" she grimaced. "Although I have severe doubts as to my mental capacity at the moment." 

Stifling another laugh, Duo pressed play on the vid-phone and the screen lit up. Mariemaya beamed at them, her blue eyes dancing. "Miss Relena," she said. "I thought you would be at conference, but I figured that you would want to know the news as soon as possible…" She let out an excited giggle before continuing in a rushed, breathless tone. "I just heard from Sally Chang and she told me that Hilde Yuy just had her baby!" 

There was a short, stunned silence, then Duo whistled. "Whoo… talk about not breaking something gently." He muttered. Relena just stared mutely at the screen as the information trickled through the alcohol induced haze. 

Mariemaya continued. "Anyway, it's a boy and they've called him Shinobu. Anyway, Hilde's going to stay in hospital for a couple of days, but we're all going to meet them at home and congratulate them…" She chewed her lower lip. "I don't know if you want to come… but… ummm… I just thought you'd like to know. I'll talk to you later, Miss Relena!" She waved and the message clicked   
off. 

Relena looked at Duo. "I will probably go." She said hesitantly and he nodded. 

"I thought you might." He looked at his hands and to Relena's surprise a smile tugged at the edges of his mouth. 

"I think I will to." Duo said softly. "Perhaps this is the perfect time to finally mend things, once and for all." 

"That would be wonderful." Relena smiled and relaxed. The alcohol finally overcame her and she closed her eyes, slipping into sleep. Duo looked at her and shook his head. 

"You can't pass out on the couch, 'Lena." He picked her up. "Let's tuck you in all nice and comfortable. It's going to be a long flight tomorrow." 

*** 

There was a heavy scent of plum blossoms in the air as Duo and Relena walked up the driveway towards Heero and Hilde's house. Relena found herself remembering the first time she had brought Duo here and the outpouring of emotional pain that followed, she fervently hoped that this time would be a lot different. 

The front door was open, spilling light and the sound of voices into the night air. Duo raised an eyebrow. "Sound like there's a lot of people inside." He remarked. "Funny, I wouldn't have figured Heero to be the party type." 

"Maybe they're Hilde's friends." Relena suggested as they went inside. Duo shrugged. 

"Maybe." 

The living room was crowded with people, mostly unfamiliar to Duo although Relena recognised a few members of the Preventers. Une, Mariemaya, Wufei and Sally were all mingling with the crowd and Relena went to greet them, Duo waved but looked around for one person in particular whom he wanted to talk to before anyone else. 

"Duo!" 

He looked around at the shout and his eyes widened when he saw the speaker. "H-Heero?" 

Heero was seated on the couch, a champagne glass in one hand and a huge, rather goofy grin on his face. He got unsteadily to his feet as Duo approached and opened his arms wide. "I'm a father!" He announced grandly. 

"Yeah… and you're _drunk_." Duo said still staring at the other man in astonishment. 

Heero blinked. "Hai…" he looked at the champagne glass. "People keep shoving these things in my hand." He grinned back at Duo. "Did I tell you I'm a father now? Beautiful boy… ten fingers and toes… everything there… and…" He leaned forward, clamping his free hand on Duo's shoulder to steady himself. "Y'know what the amazing thing is?" 

Amusement sparked in Duo's eyes. "I have no idea," he confessed. "But I bet you're going to tell me right?" 

Heero nodded. "He's so… so _small_!" He whispered loudly in Duo's ear. 

"Okay, so he's beautiful, intact and small." Duo grinned. "Congratulations, pal!" He clapped Heero on the back and found, to his astonishment, that he genuinely meant it. 

Heero pulled back and stared owlishly at Duo. "You wanna see him?" 

"If that's… okay…" Duo said slowly and Heero nodded. 

"Upstairs… with Hilde." He said and pointed a wobbly finger towards the stairs. "An… and I think she'll wanta see you…" Heero nodded again and then stumbled backwards, falling onto the couch and laughing. 

"Man, you are going to need a fireman's lift up the stairs tonight!" Duo chuckled, shaking his head. "Are all new Dads this crazy?" he wondered as he walked out of the living room. As he ascended the staircase he began to feel apprehensive again, unsure of how he would feel when he saw Hilde. 

She was in the bedroom, showing off Shinobu to a cooing Sophy Winner who cradled the baby in her arms. Duo paused in the doorway and regarded the scene, a slight smile on his face. Hilde's face was flushed with happiness and there was a loving light in her eyes as she took her baby back. The glow didn't fade when she looked up to see Duo, but her eyes did widen in surprise. Sophy   
glanced back and grinned. 

"I'd better go, Hilde." She said. "Remember what I said about babysitters!" She nodded to Duo as she passed by and hurried down the stairs. 

"Is Sophy offering to babysit?' Duo asked casually. 

Hilde laughed and shook her head. "No, just volunteering her nieces and nephews without their knowledge." She explained. 

"Typical…" Duo cleared his throat. "Er… Heero said that you were here." He said lamely. "You know he's plastered?" 

Hilde nodded. "Uh-huh, but that's okay… the delivery was pretty long, and he was very tense by the end." She rocked Shinobu gently, the baby burbling quietly in her arms. "Um… do you want to hold him?" 

"M-me?" Duo asked, panicked by her suggestion. "Uh… uh… is it hard?" 

"No, silly!" Hilde giggled. "Now, hold out your arms…" 

"I don't know, Hilde." Duo said doubtful as he did as she told him. "I really don't…" he gulped as she deposited the tiny, warm bundle into his arms. She then adjusted his grip so that he was supporting the baby right and stepped back. 

"You look like a natural, Duo." She teased lightly. "Very cute." 

Duo looked down into a pair of sleepy blue eyes. "He looks like Heero." He said. 

"Really? You think so?" Hilde beamed and Duo's statement turned positively mischievous. 

"Yeah, all grumpy and deadly serious." 

"Very funny." Hilde picked a camera up from the bed. "Now, smile Uncle Duo!" 

"Wha…? Hey!" Duo yelped as she took the picture. "No fair!" He objected as she giggled. Shinobu let out a little squawk at his sudden movement and Duo looked at him in alarm. "Uh…" 

Hilde took her son back. "Don't worry, Duo. He makes all kinds of funny noises, just be grateful that he's not screaming." She made a face. "That's the worst." 

"But you're happy, right Hilde?" Duo asked softly and she nodded. 

"Yes, Duo. I am happy." She met his eyes. "And you? Are you happy now, with Relena?" 

"Yes, I…" he frowned. "What do you mean by 'with Relena'?" he asked defensively. 

"Happy working with her, that's what I meant." Hilde said, not letting him see the slight smile that flickered over her lips as she placed Shinobu in his cradle. 

"Oh… yeah… yeah, I am." Duo said, feeling unaccountably flustered. 

"Good." Hilde met his eyes squarely with her own. "I'm glad. I want you to be happy, Duo." 

Duo realised something then. There was no longer any anger or bitterness within him when he looked at her. Love still stirred his heart, but it wasn't so tempestuous, and the painful ache of loss was not so harsh. He leaned down and gently kissed her forehead. "Hilde, I can one hundred percent guarantee you that I am _very_ happy with my life now."   


  
****

* * *

*** 

Part 6 

*** 

Heero opened his eyes a fraction and then shut them quickly as the morning light stabbed into his skull. He felt terrible; as if Wing Zero was jumping up and down on his head. His mouth felt fuzzy and as he moved to sit up his stomach did a triple flip. Groaning softly, Heero sank back onto the pillows and prayed for a self destruct switch. 

"Ooh..." Hilde's voice hit his tortured ears and he felt the soft, cool touch of her hand stroking his forehead. "I knew you were going to feel like this." 

Heero frowned slightly. The last thing he vaguely remembered was falling onto the couch and then Duo... His eyes opened fully and he struggled upright despite the pain and nausea. "I'm in bed..." he said. 

Hilde smiled. "Yes. Duo helped me to carry you up the stairs last night. You were _very_ drunk." 

"Duo?" 

"Uh-huh, he and Relena stayed overnight." Hilde swung out of bed, answering Shinobu who was starting to whimper in his cot. 

"Is he alright?" Heero asked anxiously. 

"Duo's fine... oh, you meant Shinobu!" Hilde picked up the baby and rocked him. "He's just hungry, aren't you sweetpea?" Shinobu gurgled in response and Hilde kissed him. "Now why don't we let Papa die quietly and get you fed, hmmm?" She shot Heero a mischievous glance.   
He grimaced and closed his eyes. 

"Ha ha." He muttered and sighed. Lying back on the pillow, Heero listened to the soft sounds of his son enjoying breakfast. The peace eased his aching head and the nausea subsided. 

"GOOD MORNING!" Duo yelled cheerfully from the doorway where he stood, smirking at Heero. "How's the head, pal?" 

Heero glared at him. "Omae o korosu." he snarled. 

"Now, now... is that anyway to talk to the man who has the cure to your pain in his hands?" Duo's eyes continued to mock Heero. He held up a full glass and moved over to set it on the table. "But for now, I'll ignore your rudeness Heero, and just give you the patented Maxwell hangover cure." 

Heero eyed the substance in the glass suspiciously. "It looks like green goop." He said flatly and Duo affected a hurt expression. 

Hilde glanced over and laughed. "Not _that_ stuff!" she cried. "Duo, it tastes awful!" 

"It's not that bad." Duo protested. "And I've improved the recipe... added a couple of things to make it taste _alot_ better." 

Hilde was disbelieving. "Heero, I warn you, that `goop' does work but after tasting it you may wish you hadn't tried it." She gently burped Shinobu. "Is Relena awake?" 

Duo nodded. "She's in the kitchen, having breakfast... or she was. For some reason her appetite went while I was making the cure." 

Heero's eyebrows twitched slightly at this information, but he said nothing. 

Hilde shook her head. "Poor Relena, why am I not surprised?" She smiled at the two men. "I'm going to see if I can't tempt her to eat more and cook up something for the two of you as well. Please try to keep the blood out of the carpet, Heero... it's so hard to get the stains out!" 

Blowing her husband a kiss, Hilde left. Duo perched on the edge of the bed and grinned at Heero. "Ignore her, I swear that this works!" He assured Heero who was still silently regarding him. 

"Hn." Heero sat up, wincing at little as his throbbing head protested. "I believe you, but I also believe Hilde when she says your concoction is disgusting." He picked up the glass and sniffed the contents. 

Duo leaned forward. "Well, I can one hundred percent guarantee that it's not poisoned." He met Heero's eyes. "I'm well passed those thoughts." 

"I know." Heero said, and he meant it. Things would never be quite the same between them, but the air of bitterness was gone from Duo and Heero no longer had a feeling of angry wariness towards the other man. 

With a slight smile, Heero raised his glass and drank the contents down in one gulp. The next thing he knew, he was on his back and gasping as a bitter, burning taste tore down his throat. 

Oops, looks like I made that a bit too strong." Duo muttered. "Sorry about that." 

Heero wheezed. "S-sorry?!" He swallowed and then lunged for the other man. "I _am_ going to kill you!" he cried with conviction, his fingers flexing in anticipation. 

Duo scrambled out of the way, protesting loudly. "Hey! Hey! It wasn't intentional, Heero! And besides... aren't you feeling better now anyway?' 

"I am not..." Heero paused and assessed his position. He was standing upright, the floor wasn't moving, his head wasn't aching and, apart from the awful taste in his mouth, he actually did feel fine. "Huh. It _did_ work." He blinked in astonishment. 

Duo looked smug. "See? I told ya!" 

"Don't push your luck Maxwell." Heero grabbed a towelling robe. "I concede that your cure worked, apart from initially making me feel as if I'd been blown up again!" 

Duo raised an eyebrow. "Is Heero Yuy making a joke?" He queried and was glared at as Heero walked into the ensuite, firmly shutting the door behind him. 

With a shrug and a chuckle, Duo left the bedroom and wandered back downstairs. How long had it been since he last teased Heero like that? Long enough to almost forget how enjoyable it was to dice with death. 

The sound of feminine laughter filtered out from the kitchen and Duo peeked around the door to see Relena and Hilde talking. Hilde darted around, fixing breakfast for four, while Relena sat at the table holding Shinobu in her arms. Duo smiled at the picture she made. The sunlight hit Relena's hair in such a way that it glowed and complimented the tender expression on her face as she looked down at the baby. 

Duo's breath caught in his throat and he frowned, disturbed by the emotions he was feeling. He decided not to interrupt the two women and silently slipped away from the door and into the living room. 

There was little trace of last night's party, Duo and Relena had helped Hilde to clear up after the guests had gone, and Duo's steps were unimpeded as he mooched around, glancing at things. He made his way to the mantelpiece that was liberally decorated with cards from well wishers and photographs that Hilde had put there. 

Heero and Hilde's wedding portrait held pride of place, although Duo suspected that photos of Shinobu would soon replace it. On either side of the wedding portrait were separate photographs of Heero and Hilde. Heero was astonishingly relaxed in his, a smile graced his lips and   
there was a glow in his eyes. Looking at the date, Duo calculated that the photo had been taken not long after Heero and Hilde fell in love. He grimaced slightly, he remembered that euphoric feeling when you were in the first throes of a love that was equally returned by the other person. Abruptly, Duo turned away from the photos. He didn't want to spoil the renewal of his friendship with Heero and Hilde by dwelling on his own disappointment. 

"Are you still angry?" Heero stood in the doorway, his hair slightly damp from his shower. Despite his surprise, Duo couldn't help smiling, it was so typical of Heero to be so quick to get ready even when it wasn't necessary. 

"Are you still angry?" Heero repeated himself. His tone was flat but there was an edge of concern in his eyes. Duo shook his head. 

"No, not angry..." He searched for a word to express the emotions he felt. "I suppose... I just.. I'm, well, _resentful_ more than anything else." 

"Resentful?" Heero mulled this over. 

"Of the life you and Hilde have." Duo explained. "I didn't realise how much... family... meant to me. You have what I want most, and it's not simply Hilde that I'm talking about." He looked away from Heero's face, embarrassed at how bare he was leaving his soul, yet at the same time there was an overwhelming feeling of relief. "Does that sound so crazy, Heero?" 

"No." Heero's expression relaxed and he smiled slightly. "For a long time I didn't realise what having a proper family meant to me. I am lucky, I know that." 

Duo glanced back at him. "I'm glad that you know that," he said softly. "Because you won't make the same mistakes I did..." 

Heero frowned. "If we had not believed that you were dead then perhaps things would have been different." He corrected the other man. "I never meant to love Hilde, just as you never expected to end up with Relena." 

Duo laughed. "Saying `what if' never really helps, Heero! Look... I can't pretend to be thrilled, but I've accepted things now and I _do_ feel happier when I know that you care so much for Hilde. Besides I..." He stopped abruptly and stared wildly at his friend as Heero's last few words registered. "What do you mean by `end up with Relena'?" 

Heero was completely expressionless as he replied. "I meant that you've ended up as her bodyguard and good friend." He said blandly. "What did you think I was saying?" 

Duo flushed slightly. "N-nothing." He said, but his eyes were still a little wild. "Um... y'think Hilde's finished breakfast?" He asked and hurried out of the living room. 

Heero raised his eyebrows. Interesting reaction, perhaps Hilde wasn't imagining things after all. 

*** 

"Of _course_ I'm not imagining it!" Hilde argued later that evening when Duo and Relena had departed. "I know Duo, I know Relena and I know the signs. They're really attracted to each other but they're refusing to considered it." She huffed. "It's very frustrating!" 

"Are you proposing to play matchmaker?" Heero asked suspiciously. 

Hilde leaned on the table, cupping her chin in her hands. "It's a tempting prospect." She said. Heero frowned and Hilde laughed. "But I won't." she assured him. "I'm not any good at it... as proven when I was trying to put you and Relena together." 

Heero laughed suddenly. "That was more due to me than you." He said, moving over to her and putting his arms around her shoulders. Hilde made a happy little sound and leaned against him. She liked it very much when Heero was unexpectedly demonstrative. 

"It's just that I want Duo and Relena to be happy." She murmured. 

"For their sake or to assuage your own feelings of guilt?" 

Hilde sighed. "A bit of both." She confessed. "I do still feel bad that I hurt Duo so much, even though I _know_ it isn't really something I can do much about and..." She twisted and put her arms around Heero's neck. Looking up at him, she smiled. "I really don't want to change the outcome in any way!" 

"Good." Heero said, his smile matching her own. He kissed her and for a brief moment, Duo and Relena were forgotten. When they parted, Hilde looked thoughtful. 

"Of course, the way Duo and Relena are messing about, it's going to take a big shock for both of them to admit their feelings." She shook her head. "And I hope it doesn't come to that." 

*** 

Duo leaned back in his seat and stretched out his legs. One of the best things about working for the Vice-Foreign Minister was, in his private opinion, the degree of comfort that she and her staff   
travelled in. No more was he crammed into narrow and uncomfortable seats, squashed in with a bunch of other equally uncomfortable people. He turned to remark about this to Relena, perhaps even make something humorous out of it, but the words died unspoken when he looked at her. 

Relena was reading through a long speech, her lips vibrated slightly and he knew that she was softly running though the speech. Duo regarded her, admiring the strength and resolution that he saw, but also concerned that Relena was once again burying herself in work. She blinked and looked up, glancing over at him. Their eyes met and held. Relena smiled and Duo was immediately aware that her smile was making his heart leap oddly. 

"I'm glad that we went to see Heero and Hilde." Relena said suddenly. "It was something that we both needed to do, don't you think?" 

Duo squashed the emotions surging within him and nodded. "Yeah." He ran a hand through his bangs. "It certainly helped me close a few doors... and reopen something I thought was lost forever." He grinned. "I take it that you and Hilde had a good heart to heart?" 

"Yes," Relena flushed slightly. "Although Hilde seemed to think that you and I..." She looked away. "Well, anyway... it's good that everything is settled." 

Duo leaned forward slightly. "What did Hilde think about us?" He asked, trying to sound casual, but also vaguely aware that the answer was very important to him. 

Relena's cheeks were very pink and she fumbled slightly with her speech. "Oh... well, it was silly really... but she seemed to think that there is something... romantic between us." She laughed nervously. "I said it was silly, after all... we're just friends!" 

Duo slumped slightly in his chair. "Yeah... just friends." He mumbled. He had said as much to Heero, but somehow that didn't make him feel any better. He rubbed his eyes; damnit... he couldn't be falling in love with Relena Darlian! 

* * *

***   
Part 7 

*** 

Relena smoothed her hair and checked that her suit was sitting neatly on her frame and was without creases. Satisfied, she smiled at her reflection and turned away, picking up her speech once more. Today, she and Quatre, along with many other prominent people, would start putting in place the new Trade Sanctions for the Colonies. Relena was extremely conscious that her opening speech not only had to inspire the supporters of the proposal, but also encourage the people who were nervous about it. A slight frown puckered Relena's brow; there was also a small but vocal group who were completely opposed to. Quatre and the others had proposed that Relena open the talks because they hoped the respect and admiration Relena evoked would at least make the opposition listen. 

"I do hope that I can live up to the expectations they all have of me." Relena sighed and wondered if she should run over her speech again. Before she could do so, there was a sharp knock at the door. 

"Enter!" 

Duo walked inside. He looked unusually agitated and, after glancing at Relena once, he flicked his eyes around the room, looking at everything but her. 

Relena's brow puckered again. "Duo? Is there a problem?" 

"Well…" Duo rubbed the back of his neck. Nerves loosened his tongue, but not in a way to fully explain himself. "Sort of… but it's nothing to do with your presentation… and I know that this is rotten timing… but it couldn't wait. I have to…" He licked dry lips. "I have to leave, Relena." 

She stared at him, suddenly feeling hollow. "But… why?" 

Duo felt helpless and completely incapable of justifying his decision. How could he tell her that he was worried, no… afraid that he was falling in love with her? That he couldn't bear the thought of the rejection that he would undoubtedly receive upon declaring himself? And yet at the same time he was frightened of his new feelings, Duo ached at the thought of leaving her. He sought for something he could tell her, something that wouldn't be a lie. 

"You… well, you have good people working for you now." Duo said lamely, not meeting her confused gaze. "You don't really _need_ me." He winced inwardly, painfully aware of how lame his excuse was. 

Relena's frown deepened and her eyes narrowed. She was an astute woman and nearly ten years of politics had sharpened her perception to enable her to sense when someone was trying to conceal something. Duo was clearly unwilling to tell her his real reason for wanting to leave and also, she was positive that he didn't really want to go. Her eyes widened slightly as she regarded the uncomfortable man before her. Duo had made a clear effort to avoid her over the past few days and there was a definite change in his attitude towards her, a change that caused a wild hope to well up within her. Could it be? 

"Duo." Relena's voice was soft, but she spoke with all the poise and command she could muster despite the wild hammering of her heart. "Duo, please look at me." 

He hesitated. He didn't want to look at her, to see what he would not see again, but he didn't feel that he could really deny Relena this one last request. So Duo lifted his head and met her eyes, his feelings evident in his eyes despite his pains to suppress them. 

Relena clenched her hands, digging her nails into her palms to prevent a wild whoop of joy that threatened to escape her. Duo did care for her, much more than just a friend! Her blue eyes shining, Relena smiled at him. "Duo, you are correct… this is bad timing." She held up one hand to prevent him from speaking, but it was the urgent plea in her face that silenced him. "_But_, I think we must talk after the presentation. In private. About us, our relationship and where we are going together." 

Duo's eyes widened and his breath quickened. "Relena…" Was it really possible that she returned his feelings? The desperation in his face faded and he grinned. "Alright Princess, we'll talk later. And if any of that lot waiting for you try to corner you…" he winked. "I'll knock them away." 

Relena giggled. "I won't try to stop you, Duo." She told him, her eyes dancing with amusement and something warmer. 

Eyes locking with Relena's, Duo approached her and took her hands in one of his. The other hand reached up to gently stroke down the side of her face and cup her chin. Relena's heart nearly stopped as he moved closer and gently brushed her lips with his own. She clenched at his hand and wished the Trade talks to hell. She didn't want to go and give a speech; she wanted to stay here with Duo forever. 

"Relena?" Dorothy rapped on the door. "It's time for the presentation!" 

Duo pulled back with a muttered curse and glared at the door. "One of these days…" he growled and Relena laid a hand on his arm. 

"I'm coming, Dorothy!" She called. Looking back at Duo, Relena smiled. "It's alright, Duo. It won't take long and then we can continue this later." 

Duo's eyes sparkled wickedly. "Continue what we were just doing or continue talking?" 

Relena blushed faintly, still nervous about her feelings. "Don't you have a job to do?" She asked tartly, taking refuge in a change of subject. 

Duo mock saluted her. "Why I suppose I do, Ma'am." He pulled her back close to him and murmured in her ear. "Tonight we're going to talk for a very, very long time and with no interruptions!" 

Relena shivered as his warm breath caressed her ear. "That's a promise." She assured him. 

*** 

Duo glanced over to the far right of the podium and nodded to David, one of the security officers policing the presentation. David smiled and nodded, indicating to Duo that everything and everyone had been thoroughly checked. Duo nodded back and activated his com link, telling the other officers that it was safe to bring out the VIPs. 

Relena walked out first to a thunderous applause. She smiled and bowed, but Duo noticed how her lips tightened and knew that Relena was anxious despite her confident appearance. She had once confided in him that she was always afraid that one day she would mess up and shatter everyone's expectations. Duo sighed; he was going to have to work on Relena with that one. She was only human after all, it was natural for her to make mistakes, and if people couldn't accept that then that was their own stupid fault, not hers. A slight smile curved Duo's lips; it was almost intoxicating to think that he and Relena would now be able to talk about everything and anything, and to share their thoughts and concerns without reservation. He still found it a little hard to believe that Relena returned his feelings, perhaps his luck was finally changing for the better. 

"My fellow ministers, Colony leaders, ladies and gentlemen." Relena began her speech. Her voice rang out across the silent hall, clear and confident. "Today marks a very important beginning for…" 

Duo began to turn away from looking at Relena and to scan the crowd, but then he felt an odd tingle on the back of his neck. He tensed slightly, his well-trained senses were screaming at him that something was very wrong. Making his movements as unobtrusive as possible, Duo glanced over at David and noticed that the other man was no longer at his post. Instantly Duo dropped all caution and scanned the room, searching for the danger he knew was out there. Nothing suspicious caught his eye at first, but then he instinctively glanced up to the balcony and saw it, the telltale gleam of a gun barrel pointing straight at the unsuspecting Relena. 

Duo ran towards her, only half-aware that Quatre was also moving. "Get DOWN!" Quatre cried. 

Relena's head jerked around as Quatre cried out and Duo reached for her. There was the sound of several shots being fired as Duo bore Relena to the ground, the top of the wooden podium shattered behind them and some pieces hit Duo hard in the back making him grunt in surprise. One splinter even shot past Duo's face at a high speed, slicing open his cheek. 

"Fuck it!" Duo shoved Relena behind him and drew out his gun. Shouts and screams filled the hall as the people panicked and the security officers tried to keep order and find the assassin at the same time. 

"There!" Quatre pointed and Duo saw a figure dashing away on the balcony, darting behind pillars. Snarling, Duo targeted the figure and fired. There was a cry of pain and the figure stumbled, but continued to move. 

"Shit! Only winged him…" Duo moved forward but was stopped by a grip on his right leg, he looked down into Relena's white face. 

"Duo! Stop!" Relena cried. Her eyes were wide with fear and tears were starting to spill down her cheeks. Duo opened his mouth to tell her that she would be all right when he realised that the fear in her eyes wasn't for herself. She was gazing at his chest in horror, her hands reaching up and trembling. With a puzzled frown, Duo looked down. 

The bloody, sharp point of a large splinter of wood was sticking out of his chest, just below his heart. Duo touched the point in numb astonishment and realised, in an almost detached way, that this was the shrapnel he had felt hitting his back. "That was some gun…" he mumbled. "And now my suit is ruined." 

"Duo…" Relena was sobbing now. Her hands pressing on his chest were wet with his blood. "Oh God… no… Duo…" 

Pain lanced through Duo and he stumbled backwards, his violet eyes wide with shock. He touched Relena's face, his fingers clumsily stroking her skin. "D… Don' cry…" He slurred. "'M gonna be okay…" His legs buckled and he fell to his knees. His vision was blurring and he could hear Quatre calling for an ambulance and people yelling around him, but his main focus was Relena's ashen face. Over the pain, Duo was aware of a sense of bitter failure and he bowed his head. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry Relena…" He whispered. "I'm sorry that I'm not as indestructible as Heero…" 

The last thing Duo heard before he passed out was Relena screaming his name. 

To be concluded....   
  



	7. Default Chapter Title

**Memory and Future**   
**by Orla**   
**A sequel to 'Kimi no Koto wa Itsudemo Mamoru'**   
**Rated PG for language**   


* * *

*** 

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and the characters are not mine. I'm only   
borrowing them and I promise to return them in one piece! ^_~ 

*** 

//The sky isn't always blue   
The sun doesn't always shine   
It's alright to fall apart sometimes,   
I am not always you   
And you are not always mine   
It's alright to fall apart sometimes 

After all is said and done   
One and one still is one   
When we cry, when we laugh   
I am half, you are half // 

[ONE AND ONE - Robert Miles feat. Maria Nayler] 

***   
Part 8 

***   
Hospitals were always felt so cold, Heero thought as he walked quickly down the corridors. Cold, white and full of astringent smells with the faintest whiff of death in the air. He frowned slightly and quickened his steps, rounding a corner to see a woman huddled on some seats outside an operating room. 

Relena raised her head and stared at him. She was very pale, her skin looking almost waxy under the lights, and her eyes red-rimmed and shadowed. 

"Heero..." She whispered in a voice filled with pain. Then she lifted her chin and assumed a stiff, formal expression. "It's fortunate that you could get here so quickly from L2. I hope that Hilde's grandparents weren't too upset that you left so abruptly." 

Heero's eyes narrowed. He didn't say a word; he simply sat down beside her and pulled her into his arms. Relena tried to pull away and maintain her dignity, but he wouldn't let her go. Finally she collapsed against him with a cry as her emotions overtook her once again. Her fingers dug deep into his arms, but Heero remained stoically silent. Soon her sobbing lessen and she swallowed convulsively before pushing back from him. 

"Thank you, Heero." Relena wiped at her eyes. 

He handed her a tissue. "What happened?" He asked. "All Trowa would say was that Duo had been hurt preventing an assassination attempt." 

Relena bit her lower lip. "He was… protecting me." She said softly. "He was hurt _because_ of me…" Tears began to track drown her cheeks again and she sniffed. "I should have let him go… even if I didn't want him to leave… he would have been alright then." 

Heero touched her damp cheek with one gentle finger. "Self-pity doesn't become you, Relena. Besides… how would Duo have felt if you had been killed today?" 

She pushed his hand aside. "You can be such a bastard sometimes, Heero." She used the crumpled tissue to wipe the tears away. "I don't know…" Relena murmured, almost to herself. "Perhaps we were tempting fate, maybe we're just not meant to be happy." Her eyes lifted and she stared at the opposite wall, focusing on the clock that hung there. "We were supposed to be talking about us right now…" 

"You love him." Heero stated and Relena hesitantly nodded. 

"Yes." She breathed. "And I think… I think I've been in love with him for a long time." She looked over at the closed doors of the emergency room. "I wish I could have told him that." 

Heero's brows drew together. "What is his situation?" He asked bluntly. 

"I don't know!" Relena's mouth twisted. "I've been here for three hours and no one's told me anything!" She wrapped her arms around her torso and rocked. "If you could have seen him… so white… so much blood… How much blood can someone lose and live?" 

Heero placed a hand on her shoulder. "Duo's stronger than you might think." He said. "Don't assume the worst yet." 

"I know, I know." Relena gave him a wan smile. "After all, he's already come back from the dead, right?" 

*** 

It was late and visiting hours were officially over. However, in a rare display of financial power, Quatre had obtained passes for all of Duo's close friends to allow them to come and wait for news… and to support Relena who had flatly refused to leave. So it was that Trowa and Hilde walked quietly down the dimmed corridors. Hilde was completely silent, her eyes on the floor as she buried herself in a myriad of thoughts. 

Trowa was not surprised by her silence and was actually quite relieved that Hilde was not asking him questions about Duo, for he had no answers to give her. By the time he had heard of the incident Duo was already in hospital, the assassin caught and Quatre was calling in his sister Iria to attend Duo's surgery. He glanced at Hilde again and saw her dash away a tear from her cheek and her lips forming Duo's name. Was she recalling the nightmare days after Duo's 'death' five years ago? 

Heero and Relena were still outside the operating room. Relena was wrapped in a blanket, the ends of which she twisted between her fingers, while Heero remained extremely still, his eyes closed. When Hilde and Trowa came towards them, Heero opened his eyes and met his wife's. 

"Shinobu alright?" He asked neutrally. 

Hilde nodded. "Yes, he was sleeping when I left, Sophy will call if she needs me to come." Her gaze flicked over to Relena. "Any word?" 

Relena's haunted eyes met Hilde's. "Iria came out an hour ago and said that things were looking better." She sighed. "But… but…" 

Hilde darted forward and wrapped her arms around Relena. "Relena… You have to trust Duo! He's not going to leave you… He couldn't!" 

"You think so?" Relena laid her head on Hilde's small shoulder. "But I'm afraid that he will…" 

Hilde smiled. "If he's cheated death once, I think he can do it again." 

The doors to the operating room opened and Iria strode out, pulling a cap off her head and shaking her short blond hair free. Relena leapt to her feet, dropping the blanket on the floor as she moved towards the older women. The others also straightened and looked expectantly at Quatre's sister. 

Iria regarded them all seriously, but before they could conclude that Duo was dead, a smile spread across her face. "The operation was a success." Iria Winner announced. 

Hilde let out a whoop of joy. "I knew it!" She crowed and hugged Relena before hugging Heero who clasped her to him, a broad smile on his face. Trowa relaxed his stance and sighed, a smile tugging the corners of his mouth. 

Relena was absolutely still, unable to move and yet feeling like she wanted to fly. Duo was going to be alright! 

"_However_," Iria's voice cut through their jubilation and they all looked at her. "He still hasn't regain consciousness, so I would say that he's fully out of danger _yet_." 

"Why?' Relena cried. "If the operation succeeded…" 

Iria laid a hand on the younger woman's shoulder. "I did all I could do to heal his body." She said. "It wasn't just one splinter that struck him, there were several I had to remove… some which nicked the edges of some vital organs. I suppose one way to look at it is that Duo's mind shut him down… and now it's up to him to pull himself back." 

"Can I do anything?" Relena asked urgently. "Please Iria… don't tell me to go home! I couldn't sleep easy… if I can do anything…" 

Iria hesitated. "Well… sometimes it helps for loved ones to talk to the unconscious person… I suppose it can't hurt for you to sit with him." The doors swung open again as Iria spoke and the nurses rolled out Duo, moving him into a room. Relena gasped and stretched out a hand. 

"Duo… Iria… Please… please, let me try to reach him…" 

Moments later, Relena walked into the room that had been set up for Duo. She stood in the doorway and looked at him, biting her lip and feeling the tears prick her eyelids once again. Duo shouldn't be looking so vulnerable, she thought, so still and quiet. It wasn't natural, he was supposed to leap up and flash that charming, mischievous grin of his at her. 

She approached the bed and sat down beside it, placing her hand over his. He breathed softly, his chest rising and falling, his mouth slack in repose. Only the IV drip, other tubes and the soft beep of the monitors destroyed the illusion that he was simply sleeping. Relena reached up and brushed his bangs aside, stroking his cool skin and lightly touching the neat stitches holding together the cut on his cheek. 

"Duo, I hope you can hear me." Relena sighed. "I hope I can reach you, wherever you've gone in your mind. You need to hear what I have to say… I was going to tell you after the presentation… I think you know, but I just wanted to say the words… because words are important…" She shook her head. "Listen to me, I'm babbling…" 

Relena picked up Duo's hand and kissed it. Rubbing her cheek against his palm she whispered to him. "I love you, Duo… please come back to me." 

***   
_Duo giggled and scooted through the heavy wooden door, shutting it behind him as quietly as he could. Stealthily, he moved up the aisle, his breathing loud in the silence, until he saw his goal. With a crow of delight he skipped forward, his braid thumping his back as he moved._

_The colony sun was bright today and beams streamed through the windows, brightening the church. However, The golden light was changed as it hit the stained glass windows so that the beams actually playing over the floor were multicoloured. The magnificent windows and the wonderful colours made this Duo's favourite place when the sun shone and he took every opportunity he could to come here, despite Father Maxwell's disapproval._

_Sticking out his hands, Duo moved around beneath the windows and laughed with delight as his skin changed to blue then green and red. He skipped around, almost dancing in the light, even turning a few cartwheels as he played his game with the light._

_"Duo!" The urgent hiss halted him and he turned to see Sister Helen walking rapidly up the aisle towards him. "Duo, what are you doing here?" She asked, kneeling before him._

_Duo hung his head. "I'm sorry, Sister." he mumbled. "But can't I stay?"_

_Sister Helen laughed lightly and hugged the little boy. "Oh Duo! I wish you could, but you can't… not yet."_

_Duo frowned slightly. "I don't understand."_

_She turned his chin gently, making him look down towards the entrance. "Look." She said._

_Duo was puzzled at first, he couldn't see anything, but then he realised that someone was standing there. "Father Maxwell?" He cried, but realised as soon as the words were out of his mouth that it wasn't the priest. As the figure moved forward into the light Duo saw that it was a slender woman with black hair… He blinked as the woman's form blurred and changed. Now she was a blond with blue eyes that were fixed on his face._

_"I know her." Duo whispered._

_Sister Helen sighed into his hair. "It's not time yet, dear Duo. Right now, she needs you more than I do."_

_"Sister…?" Duo was cut off as she broke her embrace and stood. "Sister!" He cried, reaching for her. With a soft cry, she pushed him forward to the blond woman and then vanished. He stumbled towards the woman… towards…_

_"Relena!" Duo stretched out his hands._

_She smiled and held out her arms. "I love you, Duo… please come back to me."_

*** 

Duo gasped and opened his eyes. Blinking in the light, he stared at the ceiling and wondered where he was. He turned his head to the side and frowned at the IV drip attached to his arm and the monitors by his bed. He was in a hospital? Frowning, Duo turned his head back and moved one arm stiffly trying to feel his torso as he recalled the huge splinter sticking out of him. However, instead of his chest, Duo's fingers brushed over something soft and silky. 

"Uh?" With a great effort, Duo raised his head and looked down. 

Relena was seated close beside his bed, so close that she had leaned over to rest her head on the side of his bed using her folded arms as a pillow. He blinked and moved his hand to once more touch her long hair that flowed over his abdomen. She was alright… he had saved her… 

"Relena…" Duo's voice was a hoarse croak and his eyes widened. How long had he been lying here if his voice sounded so rusty? Licking dry lips, he tried again. "Relena." 

Her lashes fluttered and with a soft sigh, Relena opened her eyes. Seeing Duo smiling down at her, Relena gasped and jerked upright. She stared at him, her mouth working but no words passing her lips. Duo touched her hand. 

"Hey, Princess. How're you doing?" He quipped gently, weakly squeezing her fingers. 

"Duo!" Relena burst out and wrapped her arms around him, burying her head in the hollow of his shoulder. Mumbled words spilled out of her mouth, most of them too muffled to understand. Duo stroked her head. 

"Yeah, I'm glad to be back too, Lena." 

"Although you took your sweet time about returning." Sally Po Chang smirked at Duo from the door. Relena pulled away from Duo and sat primly back on her seat, her cheeks flaming. 

Sally chuckled and entered, but said nothing about the scene she had just interrupted. She looked closely at Duo and then at the monitors. "Well, you don't look too bad for someone who's been unconscious for three days." She said lightly. "But I expect that you feel as weak as a kitten, hm?" 

Duo started to protest, but his attempt to sit up only resulted in him falling back on the pillows. "Yeah…" He gasped, then his eyes widened. "Three DAYS?" he looked at Relena for confirmation and she nodded. He noticed the dark shadows under her eyes and the paleness of her face. "Relena… have you been here all this time?" He whispered. 

Relena nodded again. She felt so choked up that it was hard to say anything. Duo had returned to her and mere words seemed inadequate to describe the happiness that was bubbling up within her. Luckily, Sally spoke for her. 

"She refused to leave you." Sally told Duo, handing him a drink. "She hardly slept or ate, just talked to you." She fixed Duo with a stern glare. "I hope you appreciate this Duo!" 

He squeezed Relena's fingers again. "Yeah, I do." He murmured, looking into Relena's blue eyes. "And I heard her too." 

Relena's face lit up even more. "I hoped that you would." She said. "But I wasn't the only one who came and sat with you, Duo. Quatre, Trowa… even Wufei… they all came, and… so did Heero and Hilde." 

"For me?" Duo was amazed. "Wufei too?" 

Sally grinned and helped Duo to sit up; padding the pillows behind him. "Oh yes, but I don't know if you want to remember what he said!" She rolled her eyes. "Sometimes my husband has no tact." 

"Ain't that the truth… hey," Duo frowned at Sally. "Is it my imagination, Sally or are you putting on weight?" 

Sally glared at him. "And just what are you implying Duo Maxwell?" 

"Uh…" Duo panicked briefly. "Well I…" His voice trailed off when he noticed the twinkle in Sally's eyes and heard Relena giggle beside him. 

"I am putting on weight." Sally said with a shrug. "But it's only temporary. I'm just pregnant again." 

Duo's jaw dropped. "Again? Jeez… are you sure Wufei's not part rabbit?" 

There was a howl of laughter at the door and Duo looked around to see the other Gundam pilots and Hilde standing there. Wufei looked furious, but the others were all laughing, even Trowa and Heero. 

"You know that Duo's going to be alright when he puts his foot in his mouth!" Hilde grinned. She strolled over to Duo's side and kissed him on the cheek. "It's nice to see you back with us, Duo." She murmured in his ear. 

"Likewise." Duo met her eyes and smiled as the last yearning for Hilde fluttered away, leaving him with a warm feeling akin to brotherly love towards her. "Now, can you do me a favour Hildey and chase everyone out of her for a minute? I really need to talk to Relena." 

She winked. "Ninmu ryokai." 

Two minutes later, Relena and Duo were alone. Relena smiled hesitantly. "Hilde's very forceful when she sets her mind to something, isn't she?" 

"Yeah." Duo fiddled with the end of his braid. "It's surprising what she can do, even though she's so tiny." 

"She's completely different from me…" Relena bit her lip gently. "Much more lively and fun, cute and…" 

"I am not in love with her anymore, you know." Duo interrupted abruptly, his expression serious. "In case you didn't notice Relena, I'm in love with _you_." She said nothing and he turned his head away. "Of course… I guess I understand if you don't feel the same way… I mean, I screwed up at that presentation… Heero wouldn't have let himself get hurt by some crummy assassin…" 

"Oh Duo…" Relena's fingers gently touched his face and tugged at his chin so that he looked at her again. "You idiot." Her eyes gleamed with tears, but there was a loving smile on her face. "I don't care if you're not the perfect solder… I don't _want_ Heero, perhaps I never did love him, not truly, but I _do_ know I want you and I love you!" 

Duo reached up and stroked her cheek. "As long as you realise what you're getting into, Princess." He said, teasing her with his smile. "You won't be able to work all day and night anymore with me around." 

"Well, I'm sure I can make the sacrifice." Relena murmured, leaning down closer to his face. 

"And I'm not going to stop squabbling with Dorothy bossy-britches Catalonia…" 

"She can live with it." 

"Your brother will probably have a fit." 

"Noin will calm him." 

"And I'll upset all your political friends." 

Relena kissed him swiftly, instantly silencing him. "I don't care about them, Duo Maxwell!" She looked reprovingly at him. "And stop trying to debase yourself. I love you, I've loved you for much longer than I knew and I want you to be part of my future." 

Duo pulled her close, laying her head on his shoulder and wrapping his arms around her. "I dreamed of you." He whispered. "I came back for you, only you. I will never leave you, Relena, I swear I will always be with you as long as you want me." 

"Then you will never leave," she murmured against his chest. "Because I cannot imagine my life without you now." 

***   
fini 

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